Creating, creativity

To create. Word meaning: Bring into being. to cause to come into being, as something unique that would not naturally evolve or that is not made by ordinary processes.

2.

to evolve from one's own thought or imagination, as a work of art or an invention. I am not sure exactly what I am bringing into being so I suppose that now as I have made clearings in my life, spiritually,emotionally and physically, I can set some discipline for creating, it works best for me. Discipline, at least some sort of it. I write at any moment, record moments that comes through me because they are so spontaneus that it feels like something is being pointed out to me and my job is to share it with the world. I have a deeper understanding of what it means to be empty, at least this is the beginning and I am excited about life. I am excited about creating, speaking my own voice. Is it my voice or am I an instrument through which the formless, sightless forces speak through. What is the difference between that which is your voice, your vibration in that case because language is something we´ve created to connect with each other to expand on the endless motions of what we are experiencing day to day. What would you like? I would like to continue creating, writing, helping others to create. Walking in life with purpose. HOw do I create? Self worth. We will start creating from this foundation. To care for oneself. To love oneself. I am worthy when I step into the light. What this means is that I have gathered enougth strength, energy, harmony, connection to be able to choose walking in things that enlighten, inspire, bring me joy and happiness. I had chosen for a long time to walk in suffering and situations that only brought me back to that of feeling of being sorry for myself and not participating in life because dealing with "others" was unbearable. So walking with the freedom of taking risks is enlightening, even if it means I won´t get what I "think" I am suppose to have. There is so much more abundance to experience being in confidence, writing from a place of boundless creativity mostly because I feel worthy of it. After that everything comes in pretty easy, listening, observing. The other day a patient came in to have his usual treatment of acupuncture to deepen his healing. It is a custom of his to leave his trash on the counter even though we have several trash cans around the office, which by the way he is very familiar because he has been coming for years. So he passively throws the old appointment card on the desk with an air of "I know exactly what I am doing and I don´t care" in fact he finds it amusing. So the I look at it, he looks at it and then I think to myself, am I going to remind him one more time that we have several trash cans in the office, one directly in front of his feet, no. Just as my fury was rising to my throat, he non chalantly says: Ji Ji Ja Ja I am going to keep doing it until it doesn´t affect you anymore....So I breathed into my fury and pushed the energy down until it subsided and remembered I was a witness to this incident and non chalantly ask him: maybe you need some more water before you get in to your car? but by then he has scurried out the door dragging one foot before the other and left. This was an interesting scene to witness, someone who in the process of his healing had become a "teacher" or at least in that specific moment found himself cocky enough to teach a "lesson". My lesson in this was the awareness of feeling how my energy was moving beyond my control and that I didn´t have to give in to my reaction. I don´t have to give to the seduction of high rush, immediate comfort, illusion of comfort by succumbing to my emotions.